Bruce Lee Profile

1. Favorite vegetable
* Mu Lee


2. Favourite Lunch
* Tha Lee


3. What happens to the theatre once a Bruce Lee movie is over?
* Kha Lee


4. Bruce Lee's sister-in-law's name?
* Saa Lee


5. Favorite Breakfast
* Id Lee


6. Favourite festival
* Diwa Lee


7. Favorite Actress
* Sona Lee


8. Favorite Music
* Qawa Lee


9. Most interesting job?
* Coo Lee


10. When did Bruce Lee die?
* Fina Lee


11. How did Bruce Lee die?
* With a Go Lee


12. Favorite hill station
* Kulu Mana Lee


13. Nick name?
* Mawa Lee


14. Favori te Hindi movie?
* Gharwa Lee Baharwa Lee


15. Favourite cricketer?
* Saurav Gangu Lee


16. Favourite Pet
* Bil Lee


17. Favourite Passtime
* Khuj Lee


18. Bathing Place
* Na Lee


Sab Maaro
* Taa Lee


Mat Do
* Ga Lee

Dosti mein darar....***ultimate one*** only for guys....

→ After marriage, ek baar Ramu ka ex-roommate Shamu uske ghar usse Milne
→ Aata hai.Ramu and his beautiful bride Situ really took care of Shamu.
→ He decided to stay there for the night. So, Ramu setup a dari and
→ bedsheet for him on the verandah floor.
→ At this Shamu retorted, "khud bistar par aur mujhe zamin par?
→ lagta hai dosti main daraar aa gayi hai!"
→ So,Ramu pacified him and setup a bed for him.
→ Shamu again retorted , "khud andar aur mujhe bahar? lagta
→ hai dosti main daraar aa gayi hai!"
→ Ramu felt bad and set Shamu's bed in the drawing room.
→ Shamu objected, "khud andar ac room main aur mujhe bahar
→ garmi main? Ek waqt tha ki ham donon sote the ek hi kamre main!"!
→ Ramu said that he was a married man now but Shamu again
→ said, "lagta hai dosti main daraar aa gayi hai!"
→ Ramu's bedroom could accomodate only a bed and a sofa, so
→ Ramu setup Shamu in his bedroom on the sofa where the ac was fitted.
→ After some time, Shamu woke up Ramu and said that he was
→ uncomfortable on the lumpy sofa.
→ At this, Ramu was very irritated and said,
→ "Hadd ho gayi yar!! A line has to be drawn somewhere!"
→ Shamu said, "Bas kya!! tu shadi ke baad ek dam badal gaya
→ hai.lagta hai dosti main daraar aa gayi hai!"
→ Ramu, the good soul that he was, relented and let Shamu
→ sleep on the bed. His wife slept on the left side of the bed, himself
→ in between and Shamu on the right.
→ After some time Shamu again complained that he wanted to
→ sleep in the middle of the bed as he kept falling off the bed when he
→ changed sides.
→ Ramu wailed, "This is too much, yaar! There is a limit to everything.. ."
→ Shamu became very emotional and said, "Bas kya, you don't trust ME?!?
→ lagta hai dosti main definitely daraar aa gayi hai!"
→ Finally, good old Ramu gave in again, and let him old pesty
→ pal sleep between him and his wife.
→ In the morning, Shamu told Ramu, "Yaar, your wife is a very
→ chalu lady. She held my tool all through the night !!!"
→ Ramu quietly replied "That was me, and not my wife. I just had to do
→ it!"...........
→ .......
→
→ NAHI TO DARAAR ME DOSTI CHALI JAATI !!!!→→→

Njoy !!!!!

Best answer by B.E students during viva.....

This is best answer by B.E students during viva. ?>---------------------> This one is for those who had nightmares during their Engineering Viva's (EEEs and ECEs). They bring back fond memories for those who care to smile at the pastâ⦣39;?¦

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Interviewer: Why is a thicker conductor necessary to carry a current in A.C.as

?

compared to D.C. ?
Candidate : An AC current goes up and down (drawing a sinusoid) and requires more space inside the wire, so the wire has to be thicker.

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External (to student) : "Why does a capacitor block DC but allow AC To pass through ?
Student: See, a capacitor is like this ---| |--- , OK. DC comes straight, like this ----------, and the capacitor stops it. But AC,goes UP, DOWN, UP DOWN and jumps right over the capacitor!" ------------------- good one : - )

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Interviewer: How will you tell if that wall outlet carries AC or DC?
Candidate: I will put my finger in. If it is pushed away, it is AC. If it gets stuck, it was DC.

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Interviewer: H! ow will you reverse direction of an Induction motor?
Candidate: I will remove the four bolts at the x-ud, turn the motor around, and put back the bolts. ? ?

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Interviewer: How do you start a synchronous motor?
Candidate: Vrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm (in rising pitch)

Interviewer: Stop! Stop!
Candidate: rrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm (in falling pitch)

************************************************************************************

Examiner: "What is a step-up transformer?"
Student: "A transformer that is put on top of electric poles."
Examiner (smiling): "And then what is a step-down transformer?"
Student (hesitantly):"Uh - A transformer that is put in the x-udment or in a pit?"
Examiner (pouncing): "Then what do you call a transformer that is installed on the ground?"
(Student knows he is caught-can't answer)
Examiner (impatiently): "Well?"
Student (triumphantly): "A stepless transformer, sir!"

************************************************************************************ ?

TOP FACTS ABOUT ENGINEERS
************************************************************************************
Engineers at work:

Assignments solved by one and then carry out mass transfer operations throughout the class

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The most important machine for Engineers:

Xerox Machine (Without which assignment Completion couldn't be possible)

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Top two Engineering Rumours:

Did you hear the results are being put up today at 5:30pm
Did you hear the exams are postponed by two weeks

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Common Engineering Dialogues after a paper:

'What is this man, 60% o f the paper was out of the syllabus' ?
'This was the worst paper set in the entire
engineering history' 'I am failing'

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What is B.E?

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?8 semesters ? ?
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?80GB syllabus

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?80MB we study

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?80KB we remember

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? 80 Bytes we answer

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?BINARY marks we get,

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? The Degree finally we get is BE

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?That is Brain Empty (B.E)?

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Kya aap Ravan banna chahte hain ??? (wanna be Ravan ???)

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Think Again …

व्

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What is the difference between girls aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68?

At 8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story.




At 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed.




At 28 - You don't need to tell her a story to take her to bed.




At 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed.





At 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed.




At 58 - You stay in bed to avoid her story.



At 68 - If you take her to bed, that'll be a story!!

Sardar

and 2 sardaron ko 2 bomb mile, 1st Sardar: chal police ko de k aate hain. 2 sardar: agar koi bomb raaste me phat gaya to? 1st sardar: jhoot bol denge ki 1 hi mila tha Sardar and Police Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phaasi di jayegi. Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha! Police: Kyon hasn rahe ho? Sardar: Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hun. Doctor And Sardar . Sardar 2 doctor: Mujhe 1 problem hai Dr: Kya? Sardar: Baat karte waqt aadmi dikhai nahi deta Dr: aisa kab hota hai? Sardar: Phone karte waqt Sardar and Home Man: Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kya karte ho? Sardar: AC k paas ja k baith jata hun Man: Agar phir bhi garmi lage to? Sardar: To A/C on kar leta hun Sardar and prayer A sardar prays daily for 2 hours, "He Vahe Guru meri lottery lagade." After 11 years Vahe Guru angrily appeared & said,"Khoti de puttar 1 vari ticket to le le" The real Ek sardar ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella me hole kyun? Sardar bola, Oye baarish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega Sardar and Hitler Hitler says, "There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary" Sardar says: Ab bolne se kya faayda? " Jub kharidi thi tab hi check karna tha na " Sardar and Computer Sardar: Yaar mujhe 1 hathora or keel chahiye computer k liye. Sales man: Magar computer me inka kya kaam? Sardar: Oye yaar mujhe computer me windows lagani hai. Two Sardars 1st sardar: oye agar neend na aaye to kya kia jaaye? 2nd Sardar: Neend ka intizar karne se achha hai ki banda so hi jaye 1 sardar rail ki patri per so gaya . 1 aadmi ne kaha kya kar rahe ho? Train aayegi to mar jaoge! Sardar: Mere uper se hawai jahaaz guzar gaya to kuch nahi hua, train kya cheez hai? Sardar and Practical Exam In bio practical: Examiner: Tell me the name of this bird by seeing its legs only? Sardar: I don't know. Examiner: You are failed, what's your name? Sardar: See my legs & tell my name

Psycho test...

A woman , while at the funeral of her own mother, meets a guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was simply ' amazing' , very much of her dream guy, she believed him to be just that! She fell in love with him right there, but never asked for his number and could not find him.

.........A few days later she killed her FIRST sister.




Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?

(Give this some thought before you answer).
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Answer: She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again.

Some people are never satisfied........ .

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IT twins.

Someone in the IT industry gave birth to a set of twins.

Guess what they named them?

See Below for Answer….

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AWESOME DRAWINGS....

Real Asshole!!!

Arithmetical Magic

Here's the Beauty of Mathematics !!!!!!!

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321


1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111


9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888


Brilliant, isn't it?


And look at this symmetry:


1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321



Now, take a look at this...


101%



From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:



What Equals 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?


Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?


We have all been in situations where someone wants you to
GIVE OVER 100%.


How about ACHIEVING 101%?


What equals 100% in life?


Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
answer these questions:


If:


A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:


1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


If:


H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K


8+1+18+4+23+ 15+18+11 = 98%


And:


K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E


11+14+15+23+ 12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%


But:


A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E


1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%



THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:



L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D


12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%


Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will
get you there, It's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

Here strikes the Old Fella again!

Interviewer:
what is your birth date?
Old Fella: 13th October
Which year?
Old Fella: Oye @#$ _ _ _ EVERY YEARl


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Manager asked to Old Fella at an interview.
Can you spell a word that has more than 15 letters in it?
Old Fella replied: -P-O-S-T-B-O-X.


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After returning back from a foreign trip, Old Fella asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Old Fella: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?


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One tourist from U.S.A. asked to Old Fella: Any great man born in this village???
Old Fella: no sir, only small Babies!!!


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Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
So Old Fella writes, "Gandhi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.


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When Old Fella was travelling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror.. Old Fella shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit back... I will drive.


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Interviewer: just imagine you are in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how will you escape?
Old Fella: its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!

Best profiles on a matrimonial site !

These are actual ads on a matrimony site. All these words are from their heart (ad-verbatim) . ~

Hello To Viewers My Name is Shekhar , I am single i don't have female, If anyone want to Marie to me u can visit to my home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...when ever u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter.. Thanks yours Regards Shekhar ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~


Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever. she may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire life can run smoothly. thank you (The principle of running life smoothly was never so easy!) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~

she should be good looking and should have a service. she Should have one brother and one sister.. she should be educated. (ain't it unique !! 1 brother 1 sister!) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I am looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on .........hold my hand forever !!! (dilwale dulhaniya effect) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

My wife should be as 'Shivani' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerr as in KSBKBT..... (Ok I haven't seen these soaps but I am sure he must be demanding too much,ain't he?) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast (by not wearing her jeans? ...) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING BOY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE 1. THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD. 2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH. (all of us are loughing ) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like this she would be called the woman of the lamp (I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this boy wants) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

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iam very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent. i am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist. (actually what is this guy doing? Postal service or tailor.??) ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~
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Real Life Math

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
______________________________

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
_____________________________

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
______________________________

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
_____________________________


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Animator VS. Animation "२"

कुछ साश्वत सत्य वचन

१) अगर किसी लडके ने किसी लड़की से "हाय/हैलो" कहा है तो वो इसे केवल "हाय/हैलो" ही समझती है | इसके उल्टे अगर किसी लड़की ने किसी लडके को "हैलो" कहा तो लड़का इसको केवल "हैलो" नहीं समझेगा |

२) अगर लड़का "हैलो" को केवल "हैलो" समझना भी चाहेगा तो उसके दोस्त ऐसा नहीं होने देंगे, आख़िर दोस्त होते ही किस दिन के लिए हैं :-)

३) लड़के जिनकी गर्ल फ्रेंड होती है और जिनकी नहीं होती है, में केवल एक फर्क होता है, पहले वाले लोग "लड़कियों से बात करते हैं" और दूसरे वाले "लड़कियों के बारे में बात करते हैं" |

४) इंजीनियरिंग कालेज छोड़ दिए जाएँ तो संसार में सुन्दर लड़कियों की कोई कमी नहीं है |

५) जो इंजीनियरिंग कालेज जितना अच्छा होगा वहाँ लड़कियों कि गुणवत्ता कालेज की रैंक के व्युत्क्रमानुपाती होगी |

६) आपके मित्र कभी नहीं चाहते कि आपकी कोई गर्ल फ्रेंड बने, वरना वो कैंटीन में किसके साथ बैथ कर मौज करेंगे |

७) कालेज में लड़कियों के पीछे पंजीकरण बिल्कुल मुफ्त होता है, बन्दा साल में दो बार लड़की से बात नहीं करेगा लेकिन कैंटीन में हमेशा "मेरी वाली"/

Why is wedding ring worn on the fourth finger?

There is a beautiful and convincing explanation given by the Chinese.....

Thumb represents your Parents

Second (Index) finger represents your Siblings

Middle finger represents your-Self

Fourth (Ring) finger represents your Life Partner

& the Last (Little) finger represents your children



Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back


Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip


Now, try to separate your thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong, and have to leave you sooner or later.


Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)... .., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.


Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)... ., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.



Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse).

You will be surprised to see that you just CANNOT....., because Husband & Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin!!

joke

Ek din ek kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya. Tabhi usane dekha ek sher
uskii taraf aa raha hai. Kutte ki saans sookh gayi. "Aaj to kaam
tamaam mera!" usne socha. Phir usne saamane kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi
dekhi. Woh aate hue sher ki taraf peeth kar ke baith gaya aur ek
sookhi hadii ko choosane laga aur zor zor se bolne laga, "wah! Sher ko
khaane ka maza hi kuchh aur hai. Ek aur mil jaaye to poori daawat ho
jayegi!" Aur usne zor se dakaar mara. Is bar sher sakate mein aa
gayaa. Usne socha "ye kutta to sher ka shikar karta hai! Jaan bacha
kara bhago!" Aur sher wahan se champat ho gaya.

Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh raha tha. Usne socha yeh
mauka achha hai sher ko sari kahani bata deta hoon - sher se dosti ho
jayegi aur usase zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka khatra dur ho jayega.
Woh phataphat sher ke pichhe bhaga. Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate hue dekh
liya aur samajh gaya ki koi locha hai. Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab
bata diya ki kaise kutte ne use bewakoof banaya hai. Sher zor se
dahada, "chal mere sath abhi uski leela kahatam karta hu" aur Bandar
ko apani peeth par baitha kar sher kutte ki taraf lapka.

Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek bar phir uskii taraf peeth karke
baith gaya aur zor zor se bolne laga, "Is Bandar ko bheje ek ghanta ho
gaya saala ek sher phaans kar nahi la sakta!"

The funniest one line jokes

They lived happily until they got married.



"What did one ghost say to another?"

"Do you believe in people?"



My friend has a fine watch dog.

At any suspicious noise he wakes the dog and the dog begins to bark.



They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.



"Room Service? Can you send up a towel?"

"Please wait someone else is using it."



When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.



"Where did you get those big eyes?"

"They came with the face."



I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara Falls .



But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not.



Sanjay : "I passed your house yesterday."

Anil : "Thanks I appreciate it."



It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look !!



"Look, guide, here are some lion tracks."

"Good. You see where they go and I'll find out where they came from."



"Do you think I"ll lose my looks as I get older?"

"Yes if you're lucky."



A modern artist is one who throws paint on canvas, wipes it off with a cloth and sells the cloth.

"Has there been any insanity in your family?"

"Yes, doctor. My husband thinks he's the boss."



I was thinking of becoming a doctor. I have the handwriting for it.



Why did you hit your husband with a chair?"

"I couldn't lift the table."



"My wife doesn't know what she wants."

"You're lucky. My wife does."



We have a quiet home life. I don't speak to her and she doesn't speak to me.



Did you hear about the wife who shot her husband with a bow and arrow because she didn't want to wake the children.



The quickest way to make tossed salad is to give fresh vegetables to an 18-month-old child.



"What do use for washing dishes?"

"Oh, I tried many things but found my husband best."



"How is your wife getting along on her reducing diet?"

"Fine. She vanished last night."



"Why don't you give your husband a divorce?"

"What, I have lived with him for ten years and now I should make him happy?"



"Young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work?"

"I ought to be able to. I've had 12 different jobs in four months."



There are two kinds of secrets : one is not worth keeping and the other is too good to keep.



"I heard you missed school yesterday."

"Not a bit."



"I gotta 'A' in spelling."

"You dope! There isn't any 'A' in spelling."



My wife is always talking about a trip to Europe .

I have no objections - I let her talk.



There's one thing good about being poor - its inexpensive.

Summer must be over. My neighbour just returned my lawn furniture

Memory is what tells a man his wedding anniversary was yesterday.

An unmarried man has no buttons on his shirt. A married man has no shirt.



"My uncle has a cedar chest."

"My uncle has a wooden leg."



"I want some current literature." "Here are some books on electric. lightning."



There are two kinds of friends : those who are around when you need them, and those who are around when they need you.



Before we got married I caught her in my arms. Now I catch her in my pockets.



He met her in a revolving door and has been going around with her ever since.

FUNNY Pics

Here is a list of ten funny truths of life

1> If you come early, the bus is late। If you come late?? the bus is still late।

2> Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate।

3> When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.

4> If you have paper, you don't have a pen??. If you have a pen, you don't have paper?? if you have both, no one calls.

Especially for Students----
5> If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.

6> You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.

7> The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.

8> After a long wait for bus, two buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be more crowded than the other.

9> If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.

10> Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker

Kuch Dil Se continues ....

Boy to a Girl: Tu hi to jannat meri,Tu hi meraa junoon,
Or kuch naa jaanu main, Bas itnaaa hi jaanu,
tujhme rab dikhtaa hai, Yaaraa main kyaaa karoon????

Angry Girl responded: Mathaa Tek aur Daffaa ho jaaa.......